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Diabetes

from The Cat Album by Tyler Shipley

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lyrics

if you know my songs you know my cats
and the quirks and conditions that they have
one is diabetic and the other is a clown
we do insulin in the morning, and when I go out of town
my upstairs neighbour takes good care of them
he's such a solid guy and I'm so grateful to him
because these two cats mean the world to me
and if anything happened to them I don't know where I would be

which brings me to January 16, 2020
I knew something was up with the healthy cat, something was funny
he's got a big personality, usually purring in my face
but he'd been quiet, subdued and restrained

and when I picked him up he was so light in my arms
and when I put him next to the food dish he just looked at me so distant and forlorn
this is really not how he is
he's a happy guy, it's his brother who's an emo goth kid
and then I noticed that he couldn't quite jump
from the floor to the bed in my room, it was just a little too much
he could do it last week
losing strength in the legs is a sign of advancing diabetes

and this is just what happened when his brother got sick
so we're going to the doc on saturday to get it all checked
I'm likely gonna have two diabetic cats
and it could be a lot worse but tonight I still feel really really sad

he's sitting here beside me looking so depressed
he doesn't know what's going on in his body and why he feels upset
and he doesn't know how all this is gonna end
I wanna say 'hey little buddy listen up, you're not dying, you just need some meds'
but the truth is we've got a road ahead
there is nothing remotely easy about the trip to the vet
and even worse is the time after he comes home
and I have to keep the cats separated from each other so
they don't fight because they're so freaked out
they forget themselves and each other and it's a mess of angry claws and snouts
these are delicate fucking creatures and they can quickly go
from everything is fine to full fucking panic mode

so my furry little friends we've got a week ahead of us
we're gonna get through it, but in the meantime buckle up
and there may be moments when I lose my cool
but remember I have endless love for both of you

remember I have endless love for both of you
remember I have endless love for both of you

I know that would have been the place to end the song
but it's bugging me bad that some of what I said turned out to be wrong
today I'm gonna sing these words and it's one week later
but the cat's not diabetic, he's got stage four kidney failure

and this week has been hell, I've barely slept and I'm a mess
but the cat's back home and he's doing ok under the circumstances
I don't know how long we have left together
and I've been fearing this day for a very long time but maybe it's better

to know it's coming, to have time to prepare
and to give this cat the very best possible palliative care
so this song has a coda just like my sweet little friend
and I'm making it soft and calm as we move closer to the end

credits

from The Cat Album, released November 5, 2020
Song by Tyler Shipley
feat. Jesse Carlson (steel guitar)

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Tyler Shipley Toronto, Ontario

Tyler Shipley was the founding member of the Consumer Goods (theconsumergoods.bandcamp.com) and now performs as a solo artist.

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